Are you separating from your former partner? Do not do this!

During separation and divorce, emotions are running high, yet do not let this cloud your judgement. You will be surprised by how many former partners have considered doing this, and it does not aid you in divorce proceedings.

1. Taking Children to Country/Interstate without consent

If the former partner has not consented, it is strongly recommended not to take the children out of the state. Your former partner needs to be able to trust you with the children during these proceedings are you discuss the children’s arrangements.  It is highly likely that if you take the children out of state without your former partner’s knowledge, when they find out, they will likely use it against you in court proceedings or attempt to further their claim for their rights with the children. Your former partner may also file a court application against you, forcing the return of the children to the state

To have a healthy co-parenting relationship, your partner and you need to be able to trust one another with the care of the children.

2. Intention to Separate

You have the intention of separating from your former partner, do not discuss this with others, including friends, before talking to your partner; doing so may damage the trust your former partner as with you.

3. Issues on Social Media

If there are issues regarding the relationship, do not advertise it on social media platforms, including Facebook, Instagram or Twitter. These acts can put a feeling of obligation on those around you to side with a particular party in the dispute and impact relationships. If you are unable to discuss these issues with your former partner, confide in a counsellor or psychologist and avoid sharing these issues with all your contacts.

4. Suffering from Domestic Violence

Do not stay silent if you are suffering from domestic violence. Seek help from an experienced counsellor or psychologist. However, if you feel that you are in immediate danger, call the police or report the domestic violence to an independent authority.

These reports provide evidence of the harm you have suffered and keep an independent and contemporaneous record of the incident. This makes it harder for the incident to be denied by the other party or at a later time.

5. Communication with other Party

If you’re experiencing domestic violence, this section does not apply to you. Please reach out immediately to a counsellor or alternatively contact the domestic violence helpline on 1800 737 732.

For those not suffering from domestic violence, if you are able to agree on matters prior to the separation, it can decrease the amount that you would need to spend on legal costs for the negotiation. Once separated, however, depending on your former partner, your lawyer will advise you if communication adjustments need to be made.